Now reading..

The Kneebone Boy by Ellen Potter,
just got it from school so I have books to read now!

My friend bought the same book as me,
I'm so happy because we can discuss about the story and characters inside the story.
Maybe by using that,
I can even more enjoy reading.

My personal fav seiyuu..

Yup,
it's Nobuhiko Okamoto!
I didn't realize that I've already obsessed with his voice roles in anime...
@@

Maybe he'll be no. 1 of my choice of anime? LOL!

I just saw somebody posted these photos about the voice actors of Tiger & Bunny,
and I saw him with this photo!!
so awesome x3

I'm so depressed..

I was trying so hard to find for a space in Cookery Club in my school,
but then,
because I gave them the letter from art teacher which is informing them about the art folio.
I shouldn't have pass it to them.

Because,
my mom thought like you're taking art,
so you're planning to or going to become an artist..
And she just simply said that I've gave up on my dreams and started a new 1,
I was saying nothing and just faster ate my dinner,
my mood for dinner that day was spoiled.

I cried while I was all alone in my room,
I'm so disappointed with my parents,
I was trying so hard to search for a chance for joining in Cookery Club,
and they thought that I've given up just because I'm in Arts.

Art not only for the person who want to become an artist,
there still many things that need arts for creativity.
I just don't want to wasting my time to explain to them,

I'm afraid that my eyes will just burst into tears,
my mom surely will try to find something negative to reply back to my explanation,
I just, don't want to get even hurt by their words anymore.

I don't have any fucking idea on why my mom doesn't like me, myself become a chef or even a baker.
If she doesn't like, just tell me straight forward that she doesn't like la!
For what keeping insulting it and making so many wounds in my heart,
At least she can say a reason on why she doesn't like and then maybe I'll understands it and not ending up like so many wounds that won't heal easily.

They don't believe me.
For first time,
I'm doing things without following my parents sayings,
I'm just, alone on this path..
without anybody to rely on.
Only myself....

Bought 2 graphic novels yesterday..

And then today I go to the website and search for the ratings of these two new graphic novels which I've bought yesterday.

The one left side have 70 likes!
I was surprised..

The one right side got 291 likes,
can'r believe is THAT nice..
looking forward to it
<3

My art folio's cover..

I don't know teacher will allow me to design like this but she did say we can design anything we want, right?

So I just have to search for a stamp pad and then I'm done..

Hope teacher will accept it! ><
I almost spend my whole day on this 

got bite by mosquito..

the red area bulge,
and so itchy..

this happened during yesterday sports training / practice,
I was wearing skirt while marching,
because I didn't bring my sports attire..

Not forgotten but the sports attire had gone to a bath,
because it's haven't gone to bath for 2 days!
got sweat almost every time I march at the field,
it smells stink!
>.<

got forced by my friend for accompany her during marching,
because she want to be FAIR...
-.-

Like, you can't use other things to repay her FAIR-ness,
goddammit..

my skin getting even more darker than before..
:(

I can't believe that I'm one of them...

During Malay lessons,
teacher most of the time ask us to do some essay which is related to Family Institution,
or maybe Gangsterism and Vandalism.

All of them are related to families problems that cause these stuffs happening around..
I'm really very hard to believe that I'm one of them,
just because my parents are busy working outside...
They just simply took us for dinner and finish all our daily needs and just rush out the house and gone to somewhere for work.

I only started to realize this during this year,
even it had happened long time ago,
but I have no idea why I didn't realize it earlier...

I started to realize slowly that my parents are as same as what the essays said,
that the parents didn't spend more time with their children.

I was wondering,
maybe teacher asking us to do these related essays is to tell me to accept the reality of life, or even my family.

I felt even more lonely than before,
I kept listen to musics to prevent myself from thinking about the reality of my life.
It works sometimes,
that I got drunk in musics....

It's really sad and lonely to knew that...
What should I do??
or
What can I do??

I was planning to move out after I had enough money for renting or even buying house outside,
doesn't feel like staying here with them.

It makes me even more lonely and terrified of these thoughts happening around in my mind,
I started to hate money more than I expected,
even I have to save it for surviving in this world,
money took away lots of stuffs from me.

My happiness, my relatives, the truths...
But what can I do....
things had changed now,
I can't even rebel something about it..